Bam bam bam bam bam da da da da da da da.

When we last spoke, I wasn't yet the official Overlord of 2005. Well now I am so hooray for me. Shawn's got until next summer to enjoy his reign. Then it all goes down the toilet.

• Miami has to beat New England, at "The Razor." The game means nothing for either team, but still.
• Cleveland has to lose to Baltimore at home (given the Shitstains' performance this weekend, I'd say this is likely)
• Tennessee has to beat Jacksonville in Jax (Jax has clinched a playoff berth, but...)
• Philadelphia has to beat Washington at the Linc
• Cleveland and Washington's total points must not be more than Miami and Tennessee's points + 35

In short, I'm fucked. Better start looking for baby blue face paint and some of those temporary tattoos. This is going to look pretty stupid on my face:

Shawn got a too-little-too-late win from San Fran, but he's still assured of the worst record in the history of the bag. Randie went 2-0 to take the week. Since Colin got his 6,275th red flag last week, Randie's write-up will need to be extra special - I'm sure he'll come through.

One week to go.........

It seems like the draft was only yesterday... so much hope, so much excitement. Yet here we are, closing in on season's end, and I find myself striving towards one last ray of light, a single goal that remains attainable.

The Bag -- or specifically, fear of it -- is all I have left. Think about what I'm confessing to you, faithful reader. I'm telling you, our supporter through thick and thin, that my quest to avoid repeating as Pacefainter is more imporant to me than anything right now. Fantasy football? Over. "A Committment to Excellence"? At this point, I sure as hell hope not. "Dolfan Lenny"? Let's not get carried away.

Or should I say WEAK 13? "Weak" as in the weak ass overlord competition this year. Oh sure the bag race is exciting, only 4 wins separate Jersey Boy from Bag Boy, but this makes it two years in a row that the top spot's been a runaway. Now I didn't do it like Shawn's fluke ass Supercharges last year, no my teams did it with hard nose old school Defense.

I expect lots of gloating, giggling and finger-pointing from Randie in his write-up, due out Real Soon Now.

]]> http://gatorglory.com/gb2k5/2005/11/ramblings_and_musings_on_a_wil_1.html http://gatorglory.com/gb2k5/2005/11/ramblings_and_musings_on_a_wil_1.html Weekly Write-Ups Tue, 29 Nov 2005 12:50:07 -0500 by Randie Swanberg

All I can say is HOLY CRAP! I already penciled in 0-2 for me this weekend but great holy crap on a stick my teams actually pulled it off. The Bucs have finally found some good offense with Simms Jr. and put up 30 spot on a really good Atlanta D in Hotlanta! Again I was sure Tampa would not get another win after Simm's first couple of starts.

.....after further review, the call on the field stands. The 2 point conversion is good!
RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH as the crowd goes wild. Gruden has balls the size of casaba melons. That's two weeks in a row a coach has had the nuts to allow his team to get themselves a win in the final seconds. Now after further review, I didn't think Alstott made it but WHATEVER MAN! Grrr I'm loving my bag teams. Every dog has his day and after three years my picks have finally paid off. I distinctly remember at last season's payoff a collective hint of elation echoing out of my fellow bag-mates after I selected Tampa Bay with my first pick. Colin says to me, "why the hell did you take Tampa?" and I was like, "uh, I think Tennessee is going to really suck." Well, my bag team is better than your bag team, my bag team is better than your bag team, nah nah nah nah nah suck it!

Week 9 belonged to me. Although I did get a half assed write up in earlier in the year, this is my first true victory. Let me take this opportunity to bring everyone up to speed on life in Connecticut. Pretty much it is the same as everywhere else with the exception of professional sports, unless you count the WNBA. But technically that team’s home turf is on the Pequot reservation, so they aren’t technically part of the state. Speaking of which, why are we not afraid of the former Indians of this northern continent. These folks are pulling in billions of dollars in revenue while quietly paying their taxes. Fuck bin Laden, I am waiting for a fucking nuclear arrow head from Chief Patient-Justice.

Yes, much like MJ, I only need to say 2 words:

"I'm back."

But it may not be for long. Oakland and San Fran are just too problematic to expect my ascension to continue to the overlord position. I am holding out hope that I can escape the bag. We will see my friends, we will see.

So many write ups, so little time. I want to start off this week's installment by properly ripping Vinny and the Jets. Vinny, you are horrible. And Herm, what the fuck goes on in that dense cranium of yours? I mean, how is this guy still the head coach? I can't recall anything intelligent every coming out of that moron's mouth. In fact, the only thing he's good at is saying dumb shit in press conferences. Oh here's one:

]]> http://gatorglory.com/gb2k5/2005/10/week_7.html http://gatorglory.com/gb2k5/2005/10/week_7.html Weekly Write-Ups Tue, 25 Oct 2005 22:01:19 -0500
Hey it's my second write up of the year. I think I had two all of last year. There were some close battles this past weekend in the NFL including two OT games, however there wasn't much in the way of closeness for most of our bag teams. Plus there were toooonsss of key injuries. Unfortunately I was tuned into the Dallas vs NY Giants catastrophe (for FF reasons) last Sunday and was entertained by what was arguably the worst game I've ever seen played. Hey Bledsoe why don't you drop another ball on the ground asshole. Many of this weeks' games decided who really runs the cellar in the NFL this season and foreshadowed what we baggers may expect for next year.
]]> http://gatorglory.com/gb2k5/2005/10/post_1.html http://gatorglory.com/gb2k5/2005/10/post_1.html Weekly Write-Ups Tue, 18 Oct 2005 21:57:10 -0500 By Lenny Herold

Finally! For reasons that shall remain unspoken, it is now TRULY football season. F baseball, F hockey, and F summertime... I'm ready for some barbeques, bourbon, and games where it's so cold you need gloves to drink your beer. Seriously, all football games should be played in the snow. What's better than seeing five 300+ pound O-linemen, snorting steam in unison like a team of stallions? Okay, OTHER than winning the lottery or spending a weekend as Heff's "special guest" at the Playboy mansion, ya fuckin' perv!